Monday, May 09, 2005

The Parent Conundrum

I'm proud to introduce my darling to everyone I know. But I am not without expectations of my own. I want to be introduced to her parents and those close to her, not as a friend, but as that someone special.

I'm not pushing the subject, for now. But eventually, I want the relationship that we have, the status that I have in her life, to be made known. I don't want to someday find myself excluded in something very important, maybe even life changing, due to an oversight such as this.

I understand the reality of it though. And I will be patient... for as long as I see that the situation is being addressed. And that we are moving on in our lives, together.

And so I am very happy that we've agreed on a resolution, and come up with a plan. To be introduced as a friend in a gathering of other friends. It's something, and it's a start. I'm excited about where it will continue to take us.

Why am I writing something of such a personal nature here? This blog of mine has had a great impact on my life in many ways. I'm a person who's outwardly extrovert, yet tends to prefer to avoid conflict... and to keep my true feelings locked up inside. It's not healthy, and I've suffered its side-effects in previous relationships.

This blog helps to keep me real. By revealing myself to other readers, I've found an incredible freedom. It's a reaffirmation of my being. There is no shame in being who I am, in facing the problems that I face, in feeling the things that I feel, in wanting and needing the things that I want or need.

In later years, I may look back on this journal of my life and be reminded of the small triumphs that made me who I am. On the other hand, I may also wonder, "What the heck was I thinking. " But should I feel that way, I will also know that the journey was necessary in the making of Gayle as a complete person. Perhaps only when we reach our destination, will we understand the trials of the journey.

4 comments:

  1. "You are who you are...God wills it!!"

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  3. Babe, very proud of you and love you loads!! muacks!!! :)

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  4. Thanks Blue.
    You've earned a ride in my car.

    Nyuk nyuk nyuk

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